The Evolutionary Woman – Barbara Marx Hubbard is where I heard this term from and at a time when it spoke to me on so many levels… one of them being the impetus of this blog.
My story starts with menopause not at the still relatively young age of 50 but actually I would estimate at about 24. I say estimate because I cant tell for sure, no woman can (that I’m aware of) it’s a few signs that in retrospect pointed me towards that time, the first being the night sweats. If you’re male or haven’t yet had the privilege of going through menopause yet then let me explain… I would wake my bedding and clothing (if any) were drenched, the heat I would emit overnight was enough for my partner to prefer to remove himself from my vicinity on numerous occasions, it was uncomfortable and annoying to say the least.
Then there was the mood swings and finally depression that characterised particular situations in my life certainly (that’s a whole nother blog) but again in retrospect it was also another tell-tale sign of being in menopause at the tender age of my early 20’s. Not that I knew that was what it was at the time. In fact it wasn’t until my early 30’s would I learn of my predicament and I use that word deliberately because it was embarrassing, among other things, at that point… I was just getting ready to have children or so I assumed, only to be told that my bloods showed a totally different life path.
The condition I came to understand was premature ovarian failure but to my “friends” I was less of a woman not only because I was barren but also because of the connotation of being in menopause – old, ageing – not something I wanted to be associated with as a vibrant 31 year old.
No person I believe wants to really be associated with being old, yet as Barbara so eloquently put it, in terms of REGENOPAUSE – the ability to regenerate, to refocus your attention to what the world needs you to do. It wasn’t something I’d ever thought of… a life without children.
It took me a lot of years; emotional roller coasters which went from self loathing to self love; testing of many relationships; personal growth and self reflection to figure out I was okay being just me. Forging a new path, one that wasn’t built on either a social construct that women should automatically be mothers at some point, nor my own life plan to have children. This is something I’m passionate about because I no longer prescribe to the Brules – I’m a bad ass MOFO these days.
What truly touched me though with Barbara’s words, when she had her regenopause moment, are how I am also nearing 50 and am finally recognising my Impulse and being conscious of using my Inner Compass to guide me. She was right, we are all creative and she’s left a marvelous legacy for other Evolutionary Women to follow, to which I want to pay gratitude and thanks as I continue my journey and seek to be the Female Wave of Change I want to see in the world.
I hope this has been enlightening, challenging and everything in between…. Now this is the point at which you get to choose your next adventure… May I suggest Dear World or Energy to Burn & Back to Nature; otherwise just as awesome would be if you share your thoughts – you can add them below or engage me direct firstname.lastname@example.org
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